“I had to get Blue Ivy out of the house. Kanye showed up at like 6am wearing a bathrobe and two pairs of sunglasses, ranting about how Game of Thrones was guilty of copyright infringement because he thought he’d gotten a copyright on the word ‘Throne…’ I don’t.. I don’t even recognise my life anymore.”
I like to imagine that in the sitcom that is Jay and B’s life, Kanye is basically Roger from Sister, Sister.
I’m hiding naked in my closet because there are mattress delivery men in my bedroom and no one thought to tell me so I was just doing my naked thing after my shower and then I was very unceremoniously shoved into my closet and I don’t know how long I have to be here I don’t have snacks or anything
update: I found a chocolate bar on my shelf but also my phone battery is at 20% I feel like bear grylls
don’t you have clothes in your closet
Katy Perry quoting Mean Girls.
i went to a new school when i started second grade and i still remember what my parents said to me as they dropped me off on my first day at the new school: “dont do your yoshi impression, it’s weird and you’ll make no friends.”
*hears footsteps* *closes 12 tabs and goes to facebook*